1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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