I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
