I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
