Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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