So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize