Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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