Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
