508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
