u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize