it wasn't lemon gatorade
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Help. Why am I so naked?
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