i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Randomize
