I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
