If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
handjob tips. give me some.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
