The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
