Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
