Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
