mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
