is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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