Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
After last night, I could never be a politician.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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