He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize