He is an equal opportunity slut.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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