Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
