it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Its about making memories worth repressing
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Randomize
