how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
