that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
