brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize