my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
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