If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
