Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
