Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Blood and glitter go together right?
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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