Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
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