I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
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