At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize