I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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