Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
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