i think i have two assholes
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
