Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
