I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
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