PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
This gyro tastes like lonliness
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
