we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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