So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
