so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Randomize
