TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
