Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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