WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
