he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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