Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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