What did we do last night that was yellow?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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