dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
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