I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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